Relational Dialectics

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Chapter 11, Relational Dialectics
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Relational Dialectics

German philosophers Hegel and Marx believe there are contradictions, or opposing forces, in all human experiences. One force is the thesis, the other antithesis. The struggle of the two forces reaches a unity, called synthesis. The synthesis becomes a new thesis, or force, and then there is a new antithesis, or new contradiction. A new cycle of struggle starts. The continuous cycles of contradictory struggle are dialectics.

Professors Baxter and Barbara Montgomery were trying to find commonalities or laws that govern relationships. They conducted many interviews, but could not find any commonalities pulling relationships together. Instead, they found contradictions in all relationships, whether they are family relationship, friendship or romance. They call their theory Relational Dialectics.

What is relational dialectics? Can you explain the concept in your own words, or give examples? It is a dynamic knot of contradictions in personal relationships; an unceasing interplay between contrary or opposing tendencies. For example: A married person has a good companion, but has less personal time. A student in school to get knowledge and prepare for a future employment may not have time to play or make money.
What is contradiction? It refers to the dynamic interplay between unified oppositions. Contradiction is a core concept of relational dialectics.
Since the only commonality in relationships is tension or contradiction, is it a good thing to have contradiction in relationships? Bonding occurs in both interdependence and independence. Contradiction is inevitable. Contradictions can be constructive. It provides an opportunity for both people to realize their differences and work them out.
What is centripetal, what is centrifugal? See P. 137 9th. A relationship a unified knot of contradictions, or dialectics. The force that pulls people together is centripetal, or centralizing. A centrifugal force is decentralizing, pushing people apart.
What are the three dialectics affecting relationships? See p. 138-142, Figure 11-1 on p. 139. Integration-Separation; Stability-Change; Expression-Nonexpression. Each pair of dialectics is experienced in two contexts: internal and external. Take the first pair as an example: Integration-Separation. A couple face the issue of connection or autonomy internally. They also externally must deal with including friends, family, or excluding them.